Palin+is+my+NEW+HERO!!!


 * And I can see Russia from my house!
 * Oh...and for all those Joe Six Packs out there, playin' a drinking game at home....Maverick!
 * I believe marriage is meant to be a sacred institution between two unwilling teenagers.
 * We are not afraid to get maverick-y in there and ruffle feathers and not got to allow that.
 * Are we not doing the talent portion?
 * Every morning, when Alaskans wake up, one of the first things they do, is look outside to see if there are any Russians hanging around. And if there are, you gotta go up to them and ask, 'What are you doing here?' and if they can't give you a good reason, it's our responsibility to say, you know, 'Shoo! Get back over there!
 * You know, we're gonna take every aspect of the crisis and look at it and then we're gonna ask ourselves what would a Maverick do in this situation.
 * And I'd also like to give a shout out to the third graders of Gladiswoods Elementary, who were so helpful to me in my debate prep.
 * I do think it's patriotic to tell the government 'Hey get out of my way. Stop tryin' to impose on my right to shoot wolves from a helicopter.'
 * We don't know if this climate change whoosy-whats-it is man-made or if its just a natural part of the end of days.
 * Well there were some funny moments. For instance, I had 15-20 false alarms where I thought I saw Osama Bin Laden drivin' a taxi.
 * Also, in an effort to bone up on foreign policy, I went to the Times Square area to see the film called The Bush Doctorate....it was not about politics.
 * You know, we've got to accompany tax reduction and tax relief for Americans, also having a dollar value meal at restaurants...that's gonna help.
 * (Forgive me, Mrs. Palin, but it seems as if when cornered you become increasingly adorable...is that fair to say?) I don't know...is it?....POOM POOM POOM
 * Ya know, it reminds me of a joke we tell in Aloska (Not Alaska---Aloska). What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pitbull?...Lipstick
 * And now I'd like to entertain everybody with some fancy pageant walking.
 * The only polls I care about is the North Pole and that is melting....it's not great.
 * I'm certainly not goin' back to Aloska (Not Alaska---Aloska). If I'm not goin' to the White House, I'm either runnin' in 4 years, or I'm gonna be a white Oprah.